 Tuesday, November 27, 2007
have you people ever felt forgotten? so used to be forgotten that u feel, its hopeless in putting hopes that somehow someday there will be a person to accompany you in the loneliest time of your life. have you ever felt that you've been everywhere in your life but not in people pages of their book? so to balance things out, you find a habit that makes you feel alive. feel whole and to feel theres something to company you? why worry i used to say to myself. i survived most shit in my life and i did it alone. but this time, i feel abit down and yes abit jealous. whenever i see people celebrating their friend's birthday, singing loudly, surprising them with large birthday cakes with lots of candles on top, i feel so jealous. im sure they did something extraordinary that most of their friends remember him/her and they wanted him/her to feel very happy on him/her special day...somehow i wish my birthdays,i would received a cake or something to be proud of... but i dont. this year birthday sucks. i only had a small birthday cake from thoughtful azura. thats the reason why my mindset towards her changed drasticly. and next year, i would be spending my birthday in camp or somewhere far from here. i feel so wasted. my birthdays were all wasted. wasted by people and even my family. sometimes, i just feel that people dont really care enough. im not being petty, i tried to be optimistic but somehow, i crumbled to the floor and all these memories flooded my mind. wishing that i could be a better person than i am now, wishing that i could do more even though i have done enough. wishing that i am back to my early teenagers life....where i could foresee everything and avoid making mistakes... its all over and i feel mixed up...but i know..nobody could do anything...life is not fair yeah. p.s.im okay. |
myself 
who am i? turning 20cents this year.(18 at heart). wandering around a small city called singapore is the most favourable pastime we all liked to do. sure you can complain but nothing beats the safety and security here. a city so small that somewhat, each of us is connected. such as your bapok used to be my bestfriend and the shotgun marriage girl next to your door used to be the brightest student in class. so yeah. i love it here. XD so yerp. serving my ns right now. basically im wasting time and using up the money they gave me. nodding my head in agreement to what they say and to look at em with the brightest eyes i could give. cant wait to go back to school and see all the little boys and bitches act like as if they know everything. 02 december 2010. world cup and ORDoooo!!! lol. thats as much as i could fill you in. anyways, does anyone knows how to permanently remove a moustache? mom says its a man thing but i think people with moustache are the most evil person on earth cept for dad. and oh lastly, i love my friends as much as they love me eventho i dont know how the fuck people calculate love. what measurement unit is it suppose to be? kilovegrams? and oh wait! when a friend came up to you and say, "Relax, theres many fishes in the sea." Do remember to give a middle finger and say this, "fishes? theres more bitches in there eating up all the fishes now." look around dear friend, sex is important to us now, that some of the youth considered it as a 2nd Language. :D |